Travel: First Class Mystique

More about air travel. I think what entertains me the most is the effort the airlines go to play up the mystique of “first class.”

They make announcements about it, apparently trying to be sure everybody in economy class knows that the first-class passengers are allowed to board at their leisure and have their own walkway and will not have to pull out credit cards to get a bite to eat, and nobody else is allowed to go to the front to use their toilet, no matter how long the line for the other may get, and so on.

And if you were a first-class passenger, you could have these advantages too.

I’ve never experienced it, I’ll give you that. But it doesn’t seem like a very good deal, especially for a short flight. You are still stuck on an airplane for a few hours, confined in a small space with a bunch of people you don’t know, even if that space is a little nicer. I think it would be easier to sleep in a first-class seat. But if you are the type who can sleep on planes, why throw around your money when you could dream dreams just as sweet a few rows further back?

You don’t get to your destination any faster, and if there are weather or mechanical or connection problems, you still face the same likelihood of not getting there at all, or not when they said you would.

What If…

What would happen if the movie theaters tried the same gimmick?

With your first-class ticket you’d have a separate entrance and be encouraged to go in first.

Someone would set up a microphone just so they could say, "AMC wants to give a special welcome to our Golden Cinema Members."

Maybe they’d give you a pillow, or a footstool. No: instead of a regular theater seat, a Lazyboy recliner!

It goes without saying that you'd have all-you-can-eat complimentary popcorn. And how about wine (what wine goes with extra butter?) Maybe a snack cart that came to you?

Would you pay $150 extra for a first-class ticket to your two-hour movie?

I’ll admit my comparison may break down when for the price I paid to check my suitcase you could sign up for Netflix and enjoy your movies and popcorn from your own living room. At the end of the two hours you won’t have reached Cleveland or Los Angeles, though. Instead - Is this better, or what? - you could enjoy all the comforts of home!