As those of you who know me well will realize, I love simple, clean solutions to problems, but I am apt to only recognize them after exploring and rejecting (or deferring) the grand, complicated, impractical ones. Only sometimes it can be so hard to let go...
Let me give you an example. I think you’ll see how this also addresses, to some extent, the take-a-sabbatical-vs.-just-stop-staying-so-late-at-work question.
I hate being cold, and especially trying to sleep when I feel cold, tense, or dirty. There’s nothing like a good soak in a considerable amount of hot water to take care of all of that and leave me relaxed. When I visit my parents I take advantage of the luxury of sitting in the jacuzzi each evening.
Wouldn’t it be nice to have a hot tub at my place, too? I’d really like that. Sigh… Well, it doesn’t seem awfully likely. It's not at all practical.
In the kind of work I do we don’t get equal pay for equal work. We set our own salaries - within approved ranges but generally based on need. Skills, experience, and job title don't really factor in. I find that rather freeing, actually, but one result is that I make a lot less money than my married-with-children colleagues. They take home salaries in the same ballpark as public-school teachers. I could ask for more than I’m getting, but it’s hard to justify, in my own mind, living on more than I actually need. After all, my salary depends on the donations of others. People sacrifice to support me. As such... well, I live pretty happily on my chosen, low, salary. But saving up enough money to put in a hot tub at home, and justifying the expense, that's another thing all together.
Besides, we (roommate Deb and I) don’t own the house; it’s a rental. It does appear we are going to stay a while, but it isn’t our own place. Who pays for expensive, non-portable improvements to their rental property? Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to pay rent. It's a much smarter thing in my situation than to buy. Someday I may have to move, and then I'd consider getting a condo. But at present such a decision would be foolish. I really like living in a house, having a yard, a garage, a basement, a roommate, and guest room. Why pay twice as much for half the perks and square-footage? I can do better with other kinds of investments. So, I continue to rent, not because I'm poor but because I'm thrifty.
But I digress.
You know what’s almost as good as a hot tub, and even better in some ways? A hot bath.
I used to take a hot bath most every night, year round. I got out of the habit somewhat when one of my roommates – who has since moved on – decided she, in fact, required a bath every night. She was studying massage therapy and seemed to have a medical need for a good soak after such physical work, but I still found it pretty irritating. She had her own bathroom downstairs (just without a tub). There wasn’t enough water for two baths, even though she preferred hers pretty lukewarm.
M. moved out, but it’s still a bit of trouble to take a bath. Our hot water heater, 20+ years old, started leaking, rusted out, and had to be replaced. When we shopped around to replace it we discovered it was a strange, now-discontinued design. Relocating the heater, putting in an on-demand unit, and similar solutions were quite a bit more expensive. The only affordable way to replace it was to put in one that holds 30% less water. At least, that’s the decision our (otherwise extremely generous) landlady made.
So now we don’t have enough hot water. The only way to get enough for a bath is to fill both our teakettles to the brim and put them on the stove until they whistle, while turning the hot water in the tub full blast and letting it run until it starts to cool (then turn it off - quickly!). Put together, our kettles and hot water heater can – barely – produce what’s necessary for a comfortable bath.
This seems like enough work to me that I seldom do it. But I can.
So every time I start to feel sorry for myself about not being able to afford a hot tub, I realize I can still take a bath. That’s still some trouble, but almost as good, and much, much cheaper. And I’m pretty sure if I shopped around I could even get a large-capacity electric kettle, or a heating coils like they use in Asia, to replace the two-kettles-on-the-stove method. [Later note: here's what I found.]
All this is a reminder to me: I may never get what seems the ideal solution to whatever problem I have – but that doesn’t mean there’s no consolation. Before I give in to self-pity or complaining, I can open my eyes and look for the second-best, not-quite-as-graceful solution that might be right in front of me. The simple solution. Instead of longing what I cannot have, or would not really choose in light of the implications of the choice.
See also: Material World (February 2007)
Let me give you an example. I think you’ll see how this also addresses, to some extent, the take-a-sabbatical-vs.-just-stop-staying-so-late-at-work question.
I hate being cold, and especially trying to sleep when I feel cold, tense, or dirty. There’s nothing like a good soak in a considerable amount of hot water to take care of all of that and leave me relaxed. When I visit my parents I take advantage of the luxury of sitting in the jacuzzi each evening.
Wouldn’t it be nice to have a hot tub at my place, too? I’d really like that. Sigh… Well, it doesn’t seem awfully likely. It's not at all practical.
In the kind of work I do we don’t get equal pay for equal work. We set our own salaries - within approved ranges but generally based on need. Skills, experience, and job title don't really factor in. I find that rather freeing, actually, but one result is that I make a lot less money than my married-with-children colleagues. They take home salaries in the same ballpark as public-school teachers. I could ask for more than I’m getting, but it’s hard to justify, in my own mind, living on more than I actually need. After all, my salary depends on the donations of others. People sacrifice to support me. As such... well, I live pretty happily on my chosen, low, salary. But saving up enough money to put in a hot tub at home, and justifying the expense, that's another thing all together.
Besides, we (roommate Deb and I) don’t own the house; it’s a rental. It does appear we are going to stay a while, but it isn’t our own place. Who pays for expensive, non-portable improvements to their rental property? Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to pay rent. It's a much smarter thing in my situation than to buy. Someday I may have to move, and then I'd consider getting a condo. But at present such a decision would be foolish. I really like living in a house, having a yard, a garage, a basement, a roommate, and guest room. Why pay twice as much for half the perks and square-footage? I can do better with other kinds of investments. So, I continue to rent, not because I'm poor but because I'm thrifty.
But I digress.
You know what’s almost as good as a hot tub, and even better in some ways? A hot bath.
I used to take a hot bath most every night, year round. I got out of the habit somewhat when one of my roommates – who has since moved on – decided she, in fact, required a bath every night. She was studying massage therapy and seemed to have a medical need for a good soak after such physical work, but I still found it pretty irritating. She had her own bathroom downstairs (just without a tub). There wasn’t enough water for two baths, even though she preferred hers pretty lukewarm.
M. moved out, but it’s still a bit of trouble to take a bath. Our hot water heater, 20+ years old, started leaking, rusted out, and had to be replaced. When we shopped around to replace it we discovered it was a strange, now-discontinued design. Relocating the heater, putting in an on-demand unit, and similar solutions were quite a bit more expensive. The only affordable way to replace it was to put in one that holds 30% less water. At least, that’s the decision our (otherwise extremely generous) landlady made.
So now we don’t have enough hot water. The only way to get enough for a bath is to fill both our teakettles to the brim and put them on the stove until they whistle, while turning the hot water in the tub full blast and letting it run until it starts to cool (then turn it off - quickly!). Put together, our kettles and hot water heater can – barely – produce what’s necessary for a comfortable bath.
This seems like enough work to me that I seldom do it. But I can.
So every time I start to feel sorry for myself about not being able to afford a hot tub, I realize I can still take a bath. That’s still some trouble, but almost as good, and much, much cheaper. And I’m pretty sure if I shopped around I could even get a large-capacity electric kettle, or a heating coils like they use in Asia, to replace the two-kettles-on-the-stove method. [Later note: here's what I found.]
All this is a reminder to me: I may never get what seems the ideal solution to whatever problem I have – but that doesn’t mean there’s no consolation. Before I give in to self-pity or complaining, I can open my eyes and look for the second-best, not-quite-as-graceful solution that might be right in front of me. The simple solution. Instead of longing what I cannot have, or would not really choose in light of the implications of the choice.
See also: Material World (February 2007)
4 comments:
Oh my, I would need A LOT of grace to live with such an insufficient water heater! To have a bathtub but not really be able to use it in the way it "ought" to work, how very frustrating!
In Paraguay, it's too hot a lot more than it's too cold, so a cold (or lukewarm) shower is great, but every once in a while, particularly in the cooler months, I yearn for a good soak in a hot bath.
You're right - that IS a drag!
I remember, though, when we lived in the village for 3 weeks in Kenya - the only shower we had was pouring a pitcher of water over ourselves in a small concrete room. But I was thankful for the concrete floor!
Please forgive my inconsiderate male tendency to offer simplistic solutions to stated problems if that is what I am doing. But, just in case you have not thought of it, you could go to one of the local HR rec centers and take advantage of their hot tub.
Greg, thanks for your apology in advance but it's not necessary. It's a helpful suggestion. I have done this. But to get into a cold car and drive there and change into a bathing suit, shower (if I'm good, since they don't actually want you getting into the tub without showering), soaking in the over-chlorinated water, getting out, changing, driving home in the car which has gotten cold again by this time... it's just not the same as the back yard, with a cup of tea and a good book in hand! When I actually GO to the rec. center to work out, well, after running I am hot and it doesn't sound as appealing. I know, I am SO hard to please. Two variations I have not tried: go to rec center, soak in tub, then go for run / ride exercise bike, AFTER. Would I be too drained? Or, better: go to rec center, swim, and finish with soak in hot tub. That sounds nice!
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