Summer Challenge

Since I am more likely to verbalize things - here or elsewhere - than to treasure them in my heart, you may be aware that I really don't like summer. OK, I LOATHE summer. I like fruit and flowers and sunshine as much as anybody, but several other factors outweigh these things so much that I am more likely to be miserable during the summertime than any other time.

One big reason is climactic. I hate being cold, and summer, ironically, is a time for being cold. That's because of the combination of summer clothes and air conditioning. At home or in my car I can more or less control the temperature, but elsewhere I'm at the mercy of others. It doesn't turn out well for the "easily chilled."

So, more and more, I have come to the conclusion that summer clothes are not for me. I'm dressing as if for winter. Socks and shoes in place of sandals - long skirts or pants - sweaters and scarves. Really.

It's working. You know what? I'm not cold this summer. At least not so often.

The other big reason is social. In the summertime, most of the people I enjoy are unavailable. Everyone's focused on their families. It's time for reunions and camping trips and vacations and backyard barbecues and other quality time with one's nearest and dearest. If outsiders are included, they are probably other couples, or other families, simply because that means more points of connection.

I know that resenting this is petty of me, ridiculous, unfair. And that when I let my loneliness sour into bitterness, I become terrible company, and cannot receive love and friendship even when they are offered.

So, it's been a tough summer, already. Holiday weekends are the worst. But there's still more summer left to go; I still have a chance. I can respond to these tensions differently, if I choose.

What is the equivalent, on the social front, to putting on socks and sweaters so the A/C won't bother me?

I have a couple of ideas. The key is to pick little things that are under one's control and can be changed without enormous effort. But here are the general areas...

- Choose to rejoice in the freedoms and pleasures I DO have: count blessings.
- Allow myself to be sad about the things that are missing in my life: acknowledge griefs.
- Make choices that feel good and are good, instead of those that just feel good: eat right, rest well, get exercise, etc.
- Look upward and outward. Prioritize putting effort into my most refreshing relationships.

What do you think? Can I win the "summer challenge"?