Still pretty shattered that Tom and I are not together. Cry at the drop of a hat. But people have been very kind and understanding. My sister sent these flowers.The prescriptions for jetlag (fight it! don't let it control you!), a cold (be gentle...), and a broken heart (what, some of both?) seem to be leading me in different directions. But the jetlag should be over now and the cold is not too bad.
Back at work with a lot of 'housekeeping' tasks to keep me occupied, including a good mix of things that are interesting and things that are mindless! I still have some fear that all the changes, grief, and disappointments of the past months - from which I'd been sheltered by the wonder of this relationship - are going to now come crashing down on me and pull me into depression. But that fear is lessening.
It's only natural that I be broken, and even be troubled by my brokenness, but it was good, it was brave, to love Tom. Maybe we should have handled a few things differently, but how could I have known? I need not harbor guilt or shame. There are some things you only learn by opening up your heart and going for it!
Still, the pain is tremendous.
4 comments:
you're in my prayers, Marti
In my prayers too. Billy Graham said: "Life at its best is filled with sorrows". For us on the inside track, in His family, we can draw on our hope. This battle, our race, is for a short time in light of the glory of eternity.
Wow, Marti.
We are also praying.
May God give you what is needed to go through the pain.
Marti,
I am very sorry for your disappointment with Tom Webb. For some reason, God has given you this great pain to deal with. As you live through the heart sickness of this deferred hope may it throw you upon the love and mercy of God, who will never disappoint you.
Rom 10:11/For the Scripture says, "Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed."
Love in Christ,
Rose
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